Q: We've been trying for two months with no milk. Should we quit?

"We've been trying for two months. I've been pumping six times a day, my partner nurses when he can, and there is still no milk. I'm exhausted and starting to wonder if I should just accept that this isn't going to happen for me. Should we quit?"

Don't quit. Not yet. Here's why I'm saying that — and I want you to hear it as someone who has watched hundreds of women navigate exactly this moment.

Two Months Is Where People Give Up. It's Also Where Things Start.

I've seen this pattern more times than I can count. The woman who is most tempted to quit at eight weeks is often the one who is closest to her first result. Not because of magic — because of biology. The changes that produce visible milk are the last in a long sequence of internal changes that have been happening for weeks already, invisibly.

Two months of consistent six-times-daily pumping is real work. Your body has been receiving that signal continuously. The breast tissue has been responding — developing milk-producing cells, establishing ductal pathways, gradually shifting the hormonal environment. None of that is wasted. None of it disappears if you keep going.

What "Exhausted" Tells Me

That you've been showing up. That this has been a genuine commitment, not a casual experiment. Exhaustion at two months, with nothing visible to show for it, is one of the hardest places to be in this process. I won't tell you it isn't hard.

But I want to gently ask: is the exhaustion from the pumping schedule itself — the time, the effort, the relentlessness of it? Or is it more from the emotional weight of trying and not seeing results? Both are real. But they suggest different things about what might help.

If the schedule is genuinely unsustainable, adjusting it slightly — while keeping it as consistent as you can — is better than stopping entirely. If the emotional exhaustion is the bigger issue, that's worth naming with your partner and finding support for.

Before You Decide, Check a Few Things

Are you pumping overnight — at least once between midnight and 5am? This is where prolactin is highest, and it's where many women see their first results. If overnight sessions have been the ones most often skipped, that's worth knowing.

Is your flange size right? Wrong sizing is one of the most common reasons pumping is ineffective, and it's something many women don't discover until months in.

Are there any breast changes at all — sensitivity, fullness, tingling, any sign your body is responding? If yes, it is responding. Milk is next.

The Honest Answer to "Should We Quit?"

Only you can answer that. This is your body, your relationship, your life. I'm not here to tell you that you must keep going regardless of what it costs you.

What I can tell you is that two months is not long enough to know. Most women who successfully induce lactation without prior history take three to six months. You are not behind. You are in the middle.

Give it one more month — with honest consistency, including nights — and then reassess. If you're going to look back on this, I'd rather you look back having given it the time it needed than having stopped at the moment it was about to work.

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